You’re nothing but a dreamer!
If you had a choice, what would be your dream job? How would it look? How would you feel about going to work each day? Why would this vocation be your “dream?”
If you had a choice, and many of you have already made this choice, some two or three times (I can get away with saying that because I was married twice!), who would be your ideal mate? What would marital bliss look like to you? Why would you want that kind of mate?
How about the perfect parent, sibling, son, or daughter? What would define perfection for you? What about a dream house or ideal car? What would they be?
We all have dreams. The day you stop imagining is the day you die. Some desires, like an off-the-charts vacation or the holy grail of meals, are easier to define than aspirations of gravity. It is not difficult for me to envision the perfect meat-lovers pizza, and I’ve enjoyed several dream vacations already. But the ideal job and mate is a little more challenging to decipher.
Well, I am one of the blessed ones. I had my ideal job and wife, both for thirty-eight years. And now, I am experiencing another delightful vocation as a writer and entrepreneur.
However, I am not sure “dream” is the best term to describe our most intense desires. Dreams are easy! Though we often do not remember these sometimes-crazy narratives, they happen to us all the time during a period of sleep called REM. REM, or rapid eye movement, occurs about every ninety minutes in the sleep cycle and lasts only around ten minutes. During this period, we experience the strange semi-conscience existence of the dream world.
Speaking of crazy dreams, I had a whopper last night. As many of you know, I grew up a Hoosier and still avidly root for the Crimson and Cream. Most of you will also recognize the name Bobby Knight who coached the Hoosiers for many years. His famous “chair throw” lives on in the annals of college basketball history. One article concerning “the General” records, “During his tenure with Indiana, which ended after the 2000 basketball season, Knight had one of the most impressive coaching careers, on paper, in the record books. He led the Hoosiers to 24 NCAA tournament appearances, and although they won the championship three times, they appeared in the Final Four five times. In almost thirty years, Knight won eleven Big Ten Championships, coached 11 Big Ten Most Valuable Players, 13 All-Americans, and he was named the national Coach of the Year four times (in 1975, 1976, 1987, and 1989) (sports.jrank.org) He also coached the 1984 Gold Medal Olympic team.
Guess what, late last night I had dinner with Bobby at my home with a group of friends! He spoke at an event I hosted and then came home with me to break bread. We chatted and laughed together for a long while, and then I took him to the airport. That’s a dream dinner to me! It seemed so real, and then I had to wake up. Rats! What could this mean? Perhaps it is a prophecy of my future. Go figure. Maybe this is the true definition of March Madness.
Dreams are easy, but careers and marriages, not so much. Some folks wait on their ideal occupation, assuming it will present itself as a dream in the middle of the night. Others received their objective only to find the elusive “perfect” fit remains a moving target. How can this puzzle be solved?
I’ve got bad news. The only kind of dreams that “we fall into” happen when we slumber. All the others require lots and lots of hard, frustrating, sometimes infuriating work. Fulfilling professions and marriages just don’t happen; they are created. You make your ideal job and marriage, and you create the dream.
I experienced a satisfying vocation about as much as anyone could, yet I wanted to quit many times. When I went to the little church on Good Hope Road, only a few handfuls of members were there. We were in debt, the building was not nearly completed even though it had been used for a year, the parking lot was full of weeds, the organizational structure was a nightmare, the music was way less than desirable, and the leaders were dependent on outside support. The prevailing idea of how to do church was stuck in the late 50s, early 60s. Yes, I fell into the perfect job!
Against much resistance, we worked for several years to improve in those areas, culminating in one-third of the members walking out one Sunday and never returning. Quietly, I called it “blessed subtraction.” I had no health insurance, so I worked several years at a second job cleaning an office building, on my knees, during work hours with people stumbling over me. I left my family on vacation several times due to a need on the home church front. I worked long hours and was making less money than I did when I was eighteen as an Assistant Manager at a grocery store. For many years, Gail worked nights, then volunteered about twenty hours a week as our unpaid worship director. I played guitar (or tried) and preached three services each week. I helped mow the lawn, clean, and maintain the facilities, pulled down and rebuilt walls, and poured concrete. All the while, I was acquiring master’s and Doctorate degrees and trying to be a decent dad.
Wow, I’m getting tired just talking about it. This was just the first ten or twelve years of thirty-eight. Well, I’m sure some of you are thinking, “Boy, is Don blowing his own horn or what?!” I do not mean this story in any way as puffing my chest. It would have been excellent had I not needed to perform all those tasks, but I was building a dream. Dreams, dream jobs, and marriages are created through hard work, persistence, and copious amounts of prayer. Sacrifices must be made because dreams are not cheap. Sometimes we say we want something but we prove not willing to pay the price.
Listen to the Apostle Paul’s rant along the same lines as he describes his dream job.
“Whatever anyone else dares to boast about—I am speaking as a fool—I also dare to boast about. 22 Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they Abraham’s descendants? So am I. 23 Are they servants of Christ? (I am out of my mind to talk like this.) I am more. I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. 24 Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. 25 Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, 26 I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers. 27 I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. 28 Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. 29 Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?
30 If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness. 31 The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, who is to be praised forever, knows that I am not lying. 32 In Damascus the governor under King Aretas had the city of the Damascenes guarded in order to arrest me. 33 But I was lowered in a basket from a window in the wall and slipped through his hands.” (1 Corinthians 11:21b-33 NIV)
Alright, Lord, I repent! I had a cushy job compared to Paul’s! I think I like my dream better than his.
So, what dreams do you plan to “fall” into? If you want a dream career or an ideal marriage, don’t wait for it; create it! You have the ability and the God who will guide, strengthen, and sustain you along the entire journey. The destination is not the dream; the dream is the journey.
Live Inspired!
Don Mark
