Don’t live your life chained to “what if?”
“What if I apply and they turn me down?” “What if I go on this date, and I don’t like this person?” “What if I try to run this race, and I don’t finish?” “What if give this speech and it flops?”
“What if . . .?” We’ve all asked ourselves this penetrating question a thousand times. I propose that it’s okay and natural to pose this problem, but you’re going nowhere if you live by it.
The present world health crisis has forced us into many situations where the “What if?” question haunts our minds. We are afraid to go to the grocery store, travel, send our kids to school, or even go to work. We’re worried we will either contract the coronavirus or unwittingly pass it on to someone else.
There is good reason to experience some fear concerning the present crisis. However, you may need to implement a good dose of fear management. It’s times like these that the “What if?” question can gain irrational control of your life. We live in a society obsessed with security. We spend copious amounts of time and money, trying to create a danger-free existence. It would be great if we could finally make an environment where we never encounter danger or risk. We could live free of fear, and, at 87.6 years of age, simply pass on in our sleep while dreaming about candy canes and theme parks. But that’s not going to happen, is it?
Since COVID struck, I’ve had the opportunity to visit Florida, North Carolina, Tennessee, and Montana. All of these trips involved flying. Each time I travel, I am asked by several people how safe I feel on an airplane. I appreciate their concern, but, for me, national air travel is simply not an issue. Yet, I understand people’s fears.
On the other hand, I have considered international travel. When I think about international travel, I determine that quarantine worries override my adventurous spirit, and I would not go. I don’t want to visit another country because I’m not interested in being quarantined when I arrive and then sequestered again when I return.
Some would say, “You’re allowing your fear to keep you from enjoying other countries.” They would be correct. Fear can chain us to our present status, location, situation, and circumstances. In the case of travel to foreign lands, I do not think it is worth the risk of quarantine. However, life cannot guarantee a 100% secure environment. It is when we break the chains of fear that we escape our present status. Nothing of any significance is ever accomplished unless someone overcame their fear of failure.
A society stricken by fear will do nearly anything they are asked. Inciting fear has always been a critical strategy of any despot. Let’s face it; this crisis has tricked us into doing some pretty unusual things. But the worst malady of all might be the mental games coronavirus plays out in our heads. Corona’s fear can creep into areas of our lives and incite fears that keep us from moving forward.
However, it’s not just a virus that can slow us down. The “What ifs?” we pose ourselves as we consider any endeavor that can paralyze us. Fulfilling life is about taking risks.
I read this poem that was posted on a classroom wall:
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing, your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing. They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, or live. Charmed by their attitudes they are a slave, they have forfeited their freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.
Don’t live your life chained to “What if?”
